Secret Life
by afichicka
Summary: Harry and Draco have believed they were different all their life but they found out it might not be so different after all. SLASH WARNING! Please R&R! Finally updated!
1. Off to Hogwarts

I own zilch except for the plot ^^ Some things in here you might not think are "right" but please no flaming!!!

Draco woke to a start as his dad slapped him and screamed, "Get up!" He sleepily got dressed. Days were always like this after Narcissa was killed by Harry Potter. _Who the hell cares if my mom died _he thought to himself trying to get his mind off her.

"Good morning Mr. Malfoy," said the always cheery maid. She can always tell if you're in a bad mood. He couldn't help but smile as she clumsily did her chores. Then he headed down stairs to eat. People think that because he's a rich snobby pureblood he has the greatest things, but honestly his dad got everything. Draco only had a room the size of a closet, and his greatest possession was his blade.

When Narcissa was still alive, Draco was treated fairly, but now beatings have become regular and cutting his new favorite hobby. _That Potter boy has it so easy. _He didn't know it, but Harry was thinking around the same thing…

Harry slammed his door after another screaming from Uncle Vernon. He knew he'd get into big trouble from them by walking out like he did, but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything anymore he realized with a start. With a sigh he stared at the newly formed scars on his wrist. What he wanted was someone who'd understand him. Ron would just stare and Hermione would only look up a book on depression.

Harry still had the haunting image in his mind of Narcissa being killed by Voldemort. Now everyone thinks he was the murderer. Draco wasn't a person he was especially fond of, but he felt bad for his mother dying. _What the hell does he know? At least he has his dad! He's probably at his house now practically in heaven…_

Draco was curled up on the floor his whole body bleeding from the cuts and bruises his father just gave him trying to knock out the sound of his father's accusations. "Damn boy are you fucking listening to me?" his father yelled sending the cruciatus curse upon him. He screamed, and his father immediately hit him. To Draco's luck the doorbell rang causing Lucious Malfoy to have to answer to the guest. All he said as he left was clean yourself up.

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How can I suffer another month in this hell? He thought. Just then his father walked in saying Dumbledore was here to see him. Draco put a hiding curse over the cuts and bruises, for if he healed them his father would only cut him more severely.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Malfoy," Dumbledore said in greeting.

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Good afternoon? Yeah right… "Good afternoon to you too," he replied.

"You've been an outstanding student, and Hogwarts is choosing the best students to help with their new project. We're starting a summer school for the first years that want a head start on their learning. You would leave tomorrow and stay at the facilities till Christmas break if you choose to leave. Are you interested?" Dumbledore stated.

"Yes if course sir, let me see if it is acceptable with my father." _Anything to get out of here._ So he left to ask his father. Even if he said no, Draco would leave anyway.

"Fine, but once you get there kill Harry Potter."

Ok this is my first fanfic so be nice! Please r&r!


	2. Harry Gets Two Letters

Thanks to my wonderful reviewers! * hugglez * Hehe once again I don't own anything but the main plot the little genius J. K. Rowling owns the rest! I'm sorry, but no Draco in the chapter L . Please R&R so I know if I should keep going!J 

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Harry ducked as an owl swooped in narrowly missing his head. The owl dropped the letter and settled inside Hedwig's open and empty birdcage (she was out hunting). "Make yourself at home," he mumbled. He opened the letter and it read:

Albus Dumbledore's Office

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mr. Potter:

Hogwarts is planning a summer school for first years that want to be ahead with their learning. We want students who have shown a real skill for witchcraft to come and help us teach and assist them. You are one of those students! Please reply to this as soon as possible if you may come or not.

Sincerely,

Albus Dumbledore

Harry read the letter again to make sure he read it correctly. He couldn't believe he would get to go to Hogwarts a month earlier! Quickly, he wrote a reply and sent the owl back on its way. Just then Dudley called out, "Hey Potty-for-brains, mom wants you down here and she's 'gonna kick your ass!" Harry just rolled his eyes. _He can't even think of a better name than that? _Nothing would bring him down today.

After finishing his chores while they were repeatedly ruined by the pig (as in Dudley), Harry doubted that nothing actually could bring him down. Just then Pig, Ron's little but fat owl, swooped in. After running into multiple things, Pig finally stopped on Harry's bed. Harry went over and flopped down to read the letter. Harry immediately recognized the scrawny handwriting of Ron.

Harry

I got a visit from Dumbledore and he says I'm gonna get to go to Hogwarts since I'm some outstanding student! I'm thinking you did too with Dumbledore liking you so much, so I'm coming over at midnight with permission or not!

Ron

Harry glanced at the clock. It was 11:30 already! "Nice timing Pig," he muttered. He hurriedly packed up his things and had 5 minutes to spare. Hedwig had returned earlier that day, for which Harry was very thankful. With a jolt, Harry realized he didn't know how Ron was coming! Mr. Weasley disabled the flying car and that left floo powder or apparating (they learned illegally by the way). Either way Ron was going to wake up the whole neighborhood!

He left a letter for the relatives so they'd know where he was (like they'd even care), grabbed Pig, and headed downstairs to the fireplace. Ron had only seen the living room so he'd probably apparate there or come by the floo network. Suddenly, Ron came hurtling out of the fireplace with a crash and to Harry's dismay he saw his aunt and uncle's light click on. "Hurry up, Ron!" Harry urged and stepped into the fireplace. "Hogwarts!" he yelled.

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A/N: Also, as my friend has so graciously pointed out, I know Ron shouldn't come hurtling out of the fireplace, but I wanted to make him do that so … I did! Hehe, I'm not updating till I get two reviews this time! Wow, two reviews…so much…


	3. At Hogwarts

Hello!!! It's time for Draco's return hehe. Thanks to my wonderful reviewers. Although I only got one reviewer besides my "friend" who called me crazy that I told him to go there. -.- Once again I don't own anything but the basic plot and the wonderful J. K. Rowling owns the rest. Please R&R and tell me how I'm doing!!! Oh yeah, there's a little part in here about dry humping so if that offends you, wouldn't recommend reading!

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Draco appeared in the fireplace of Professor Snape's dungeon. He wondered why he even had one because his room was always cold and he never lit it. Snape looked up from the work he was doing (probably their first exam) and nodded in greeting. The blonde-haired boy did the same and thought _I wonder if Snape would still think of me as the class pet if he knew what I had to do even if he's not especially fond of Harry _(referring to his father's order to kill the boy who lived).

Draco climbed up the stairs and went into the grand hall. There were not that many people to help teach, but the ones that were there looked ecstatic to already be at Hogwarts. Some of the students at the Gryffindor table were, as he guessed, Harry, Ron, and Hermione. He was surprised to see Neville wandering around. At Ravenclaw's side there was Cho Chang, their seeker. Draco suppressed a groan as Pansy Parkinson walked up to him.

"Hey Dracy Dragon. I was hoping you'd be here," trying to sound seducing but her voice still sounded lake nails against a chalk board, and she was trailing her finger in a circle around his chest.

"Hi Pansy," he replied trying not to hurl.

"We haven't seen each other in a month, and that's all you have to say? Come here you bitch," she said and started furiously making out with him as Draco tried to push her away.

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From a distance, this occurrence looked wrongly like dry humping. Ron turned a bit paler as he saw this, and Hermione scowled ferociously, but Harry didn't even notice. For some reason he was feeling down.

Ron commented, obviously disgusted, "God, will the whores save it for a fucking room? Right Harry? HARRY!"

"Wha?" Harry said snapping out of a daze. Ron swung his head to the busy couple. They all watched and smiled as Professor McGonagall swept over to the scene and broke them up. Harry's smile was a little bit fake though. He couldn't help but feel bad for the blonde; he obviously didn't want to do it. The boys glanced at each other and eyes met. Harry didn't know what he saw in Malfoy's eyes, but it was breaking his heart.

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Draco continued to stare as Harry turned away. _He's probably ashamed that he killed my mother_, he thought with a sneer. Malfoy looked Harry over once. It was obvious the boy had grown. His face was angled and sharp and Harry's once scraggly body had blossomed into a fairly tall, muscle haven. He couldn't help feeling a bit attracted to the other boy. Draco was staring so intently he didn't notice Harry's friends leaving or Harry coming up to talk to him…

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There it is! Chapter three of my epic tale hehe. Does Snape have a fireplace? * thinks * Now it does! Longest chapter yet! * feels special * What will Harry talk to Draco about? Tune in next time for * music * SECRET LIVES! Question for readers: Do you think I should make my chapters longer? Now I'll start on the bidding for reviews do I hear a two? Two? Three, thank you! 25 thank you sir…


	4. Unwelcomed Meetings

HI FRIENDS! You're about to embark on a magical journey through what I love to call Secret Lives. Thanks again to my wonderful reviewers! * Muah * Just a reminder, if you review you'll get your name posted on the last chapter! So it's a good thing to take one precious moment of your life to review. OK, I've decided to make this chapter a little longer than the others so sorry it took a little while longer. This is quite long so I'll get to the good stuff. Disclaimer: I ain't thunk up nothin but the plot. J. K. Rowling's the feller who's smart. Not me HillBilly Joe Billy. Anyways, we left off as Harry was approaching Draco…

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"Malfoy," Harry sneered.

"Potter," Draco spat back as he was snapping out of his daze.

"I need to settle something outside, so if you'd be so kind," gesturing towards the door. Draco walked out of the room not even saying anything to Harry. Harry took this silence to look the blonde over. _Not bad_, he thought to himself. Like himself, Malfoy had grown a little over the summer. The boy who lived disgustingly found his eyes lingering over Draco's ass before moving on.

Draco turned suddenly and asked, "What is it, Potter."

"As you know, Voldemort is getting stronger and-"

"Don't you think we all know that from Dumbledore's little pep-talks…" as Draco was speaking, he walked to the side a little, cornering Harry.

Harry who didn't notice the action kept talking, "Malfoy this is serious! Act mature for once!"

"Of course this is serious," he sneered. Harry who abruptly noticed his position began to get a little nervous. Meanwhile, a thousand thoughts were racing through the blonde's head. _Should I do it now and get it over with?_ A look at Harry's pleading eyes told him the answer was no. _Fuck Draco what's happening to you? You would have killed him last year. _But Draco thought _This isn't last year anymore._ "See you in potions Potter," he spat and stalked off.

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Harry crumpled on the floor as he tried to figure out what had just happened. _Was Draco about to kill me, or am I actually losing it? But if he was, why didn't he?_ Harry couldn't help feeling a little attracted to him after he didn't kill him. "Great," he muttered to himself, "falling in love with the enemy." The boy who lived only meant to ask him to help him in the war. He knew straight away that this year was going to be different. He pulled himself up and made his way back to the Grand Hall.

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Draco you idiot! He scolded himself. _Now Harry thinks your some kind of softy. Malfoys are NOT softies! _Shutting himself in a bathroom stall, he got out his last possession of hope: his switchblade. The blonde cut the figure of a snake in his arm and laid his head back as he let the blood flow. Draco was all alone. No one cared for him. Not even himself…

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Harry walked into the lunch hall to the unwelcoming sight of Ron and Hermione snogging. He just rolled his eyes and grabbed a piece of toast. A clink of silverware brought the couple out of their "love session." 

"Oi, sorry Harry. We err didn't see you come in," Ron stuttered.

"Whatever guys," was the simple response to that. He continued shakingly spreading butter on the toast.

"Harry, are you OK?" Hermione asked, sounding concerned.

"Yea I'm fi – SHIT!" He yelped as the knife slipped and grazed his wrist. His mishap earned the disapproving glare or the professors. As Harry stared down at the free-flowing blood on his wrist, he was frightened to find that it barely hurt and it made him happy. Harry shook those thoughts from his mind and ran off holding his wrist to Madame Pomfrey.

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As Harry was approached the hospital wing he began to hear the shouts of Blaise Zambini. He was only able to pick up bits of the yelling.

"Found…Bathroom…Switchblade…Cutting wrists…Malfoy…Suicide…"

Harry tried to enter as quietly as he could. During his entrance, he noticed a crumpled form in a hospital bed of which Blaise and the nurse were yelling.

"Will you just shut up!" a familiar voice yelled. Though it was weaker from the loss of blood.

"Excuse me," Harry pardoned timidly.

"Oh, another suicidal teen eh? They don't pay me enough to do this job. Take a bed by Mr. Malfoy over there." Madame Pomfrey answered.

The boy who lived felt a jolt at hearing that Draco, the proud git Draco, had tried suicide. He made his way over to the bed next to Draco, trying not to disturb him.

"So I'm not the only one, huh?" Draco croaked.

"Uh, actually-"

"Shush shush, you boys get some rest and stay away from knives will you?" Madame Pomfrey warned.

"Better do what she says," Malfoy added whispered, so quietly Harry had trouble hearing him, "She almost killed me when I tried to bruise Zambini." He ended with a laugh, and then Harry heard the deep breathing of sleep coming from the boy next to him. Harry felt the unnatural urge to hold the dragon and stroke him till all his fears simply passed away…

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So there is chapter four. Hope you liked! If the rating doesn't change soon I'll have to re-post it but all well. Tell me what you think and sorry the author's notes are so long! I greatly await your reviews and I won't post again unless you review. J 


	5. Confessions

Have no fear! Chapter five is here! Sorry, it's been three weeks exactly since I updated. Well I'm in a dark mood so I fear this will be a dark chapter. Thanks for the review I got last chapter! At least SOMEONE cares that I finish the story. In the next reviews tell me if you think I'm making it too angsty, not angsty enough (yes angsty is my word). All right, on with the chapter! Disclaimer: I own nothing, sadly, except for the "special" basic plot. Ms. J. K. Rowling, otherwise known as the genius with all the brains, owns everything and everyone else.

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Recap:

"Better do what she says," Malfoy added whispered, so quietly Harry had trouble hearing him, "She almost killed me when I tried to bruise Zambini." He ended with a laugh, and then Harry heard the deep breathing of sleep coming from the boy next to him. Harry felt the unnatural urge to hold the dragon and stroke him till all his fears simply passed away…

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Harry finally fell into a fitful sleep dreaming of Draco being tortured by a dragon with the face of Lucius Malfoy, until Madame Pomfrey awakened him. "I believe you've had enough rest by now, Mr. Potter," she said sternly. He sat up slowly and realized it was noon at least. "You've had quite a lot of visitors. I swear all of Hogwarts emptied out to see you."

"Did anyone visit Malfoy?" Harry asked. _Why do I even care?_ He asked himself. The blonde was still sleeping soundly in the next bed.

Madame Pomfrey seemed a little taken-aback from the sudden interest in Draco. "Why uh no," she stammered, "aside from Pansy Parkinson." Harry groaned inwardly. Pansy was, to him, the most annoying bitch ever to hang on Draco's arm. And there has been many. "You're cuts weren't bad at all, so you may go now, Mr. Potter."

The boy-who-lived muttered a quick thank you before hurrying out the door. He had a lot of thinking to do. Plus, he was dying to ask Hermione to look up reasons for suicide. "Why do you even care about suicide? Just because Malfoy tried doesn't mean I need to obsess over it," he told himself. Harry kept running straight into none other than Lucius Malfoy. "Uh, sorry Mr. Malfoy sir," he stuttered, heart racing.

"Watch yourself boy. Soon I'm going to dock Gryffindor 30 points for intrusions like that. By the way, I'd like you to meet your new Dark Arts teacher." Lucius said in his normal snobby tone, brushed past Harry, and made his way towards Dumbledore's office leaving Harry in shock. _Malfoy is a teacher now? _Now Harry had something to tell both his friends.

It was Saturday and being the beginning of the year, so there wasn't much homework to be done. Hogwarts students were walking outside and strolling in the halls, but Harry knew they'd be in the common room. He came upon the fat lady portrait sooner than expected. "Zambini's kiss," Harry said. Zambini's kiss was the password to get in. Ron's idea of course. Harry entered the common room to the sight of Hermione and Ron snogging on the couch. "Get a room!" Harry exclaimed, hiding a grin and the couple immediately shot up.

Panting, Ron said, "Uh, hi Harry! Hermione was just um, teaching me the laws of physics!"

"Yea, the physics with some tongue!" Harry replied playfully, "But guys, I found out a lot from being in the hospital."

Hermione slapped a hand over her face and apologized, "Oh, Harry! Sorry we weren't there when you woke up! We tried 5 times and the fifth time Madame Pomfrey was about to send us to St. Mungo's…"

"Hermione, that doesn't matter! Malfoy's dad is the new Dark Art's professor!"

Ron's face turned even paler at the name. "He hates Gryffindor! First we get stuck with Snape and now Lucius?"

"Calm down, Ron!" Hermione ordered, "Didn't you say you had another thing to tell us, Harry?"

"Uh, yes I did actually," Harry decided he didn't think he should tell his friends about Draco just yet, "Madame Pomfrey thinks I'm suicidal now." As he said this, the trio burst out laughing. The boy-who-lived only laughed a little. Draco's limp form haunted his mind like a nightmare from the past.

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Draco woke up with his wrists searing with pain. _I can't believe I almost ended it, but it felt so right._

"Ok, Mr. Malfoy, let's see those wrists." She said as she unwound the bandages, "You know one person came to visit you. Pansy Parkinson. I always liked that girl, always has a smile on her face…" _more like a smirk_ "and the other boy asked about you. Harry Potter, yes that's it."

Draco's heart skipped a beat. Harry asked about him? Being stuck to a hospital bed gave you time to think, and Draco realized that he, the Slytherin prince, liked Harry Potter. Madame Pomfrey had finished unwinding his bandages. When they saw his wrists they both immediately wished they hadn't done it. There was dried blood around the at least twenty new cuts made to end his life, and some old cuts were reopened. It was swollen and red all over.

"Gosh," Madame Pomfrey said, searching for words, "You sure did do a number on those didn't you." They stayed in that position for a few seconds: Draco wishing he wasn't alive, and Madame Pomfrey wondering how many others cut themselves. Then she set to work on healing them.

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Why does she even bother healing them since I'm going to cut again anyway? A couple of minutes and bandages later, Draco was allowed to leave. He went out the door without a thank you and straight to the Slytherin common room. No sooner was he in the room, than Pansy Parkinson came up to him and said, "Aw Dracy. I was so worried." She cupped his balls, "I hope your not too tired tonight."

"Shove off, Pansy. I am tired!"

"Oh come on Dracy. Just one good, hard fuck…"

Draco pushed Pansy to the ground. "Pansy, I sure as hell don't wanna fuck you! And my name is Draco not Dracy so fucking learn how to say it right!"

"This is what I was afraid of. Blaise, get Draco to my room." Blaise had become one of the tallest and strongest students in Hogwarts. It was too bad he wasn't a good quidditch player. Draco had remained being elegantly strong but still not as strong as Blaise. Zambini took Draco's arms behind his back and shoved him into Pansy's quarters. "I'll take it from here."

"Pansy get away from me you whore!" Draco yelled, but his voice cracked revealing his fear.

"Shut up Malfoy. I asked you nicely, but you wouldn't listen, so now your gonna pay!" She got her wand out. "STUPEFY!" Doing a charm they had just learned, she allowed him to speak.

"Pansy, please don't do this." Draco begged. This reminded him too much of his nights with his father.

"Too late now!" She ripped off his clothes and drove her fingers inside of Draco making him scream in pain. His father would put a charm making him tight all over again. Just how he likes it. Pansy grabbed his dick and pulled it and bit it. Then she shoved it up her clit. "Oh god Draco!"

"Fuck Pansy get off of me!"

"No!" She continued torturing him till he was on the verge of tears, until she finally reached her climax. Pansy suddenly trying to be sweet said, "Draco, you didn't cum. Why didn't you cum?"

"Cuz I fucking hate you!" he yelled, making her slap him and kick his tender crotch.

"You'll regret that. CRUCIO!" and with that, she undid the stupefying curse, and went out the door.

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Harry awoke to the sound of Draco screaming in pain and his scar throbbing. He clutched his scar and shook Ron, "Ron, get up," he mumbled, "do you hear that screaming?"

"No, Hermione. You're just dreaming…" Ron mumbled back.

Harry shook his head and decided to get up and ready, since he was awake and all. Then he'd investigate the screaming that was still going on. He threw on a pair of baggy but tight blue jeans, an AFI T-shirt, and headed out the door. _Maybe I should have left a note for Ron,_ he thought but quickly shook his head to clear that away. The screaming led him in front of the Slytherin Commonroom. _I don't think I should get in, but whoever it is I have to help him._ Harry battled the situation in his mind but officially decided to try a password until he got in.

A snake slithered onto the new painting and hissed, "Password?"

Harry threw out the first thing he thought they would do as a password, "Harry is a dork." And with that, the portrait swung aside._ Might have guessed…_ Thankfully the commonroom was empty seeing as Harry forgot his invisibility cloak, but he continued to follow the screaming up to a fancy room with the name Draco carved into the door in snake-like letters. He tried to open the door, and it surprisingly opened, but when he looked inside he immediately wished he had stayed in bed. Draco was writhing, naked in the bed screaming in pain. Harry cautiously crept up to the bed.

"Who's there?!" Draco started to ask but stopped due to an outburst of pain. Harry stopped moving, but suddenly he could almost feel the intense pain Draco was in. He dropped all caution and ran to Draco's bed and began stroking him without thinking.

"Draco, Shh, it's Ok. You'll be fine." He cooed and Draco calmed down and lay still, sobbing,

"Potter? What are you doing here, and how did you do that?"

"I heard someone screaming, followed it, and it led to you. And how did I do what?"

"As soon as you touched me the pain just went away. Harry, you just did magic without a wand!"

They stumbled into an awkward silence after Draco said Harry's first name, "Did you just say my actual name?"

"Yes I did. Would you like a medal for that too?"

"Fine, if you were going to be like that, Draco, I guess I'll just leave," Harry immediately clamped a hand over his mouth after saying his name.

"No! Don't go!" Draco replied in a pleading tone, "I mean, I think we need to talk."

"I agree," Harry moved to sit down next to Draco who had pulled out some pants to cover himself.

"What in bloody hell is a Gryffindor doing in your room, Draco? Did you sink that low already?" said the all-to-familiar voice of Blaise Zambini. "Pansy not too violent for you to get the point?"

"What po.." Draco faltered but felt Harry's arm wrap around his waist giving him strength, "Just what point might that be, Zambini?"

"That you're a stupid rotten Malfoy, once a death-eater, always a death-eater. But I guess you haven't told your new little boyfriend your secret yet, have you?" and with that, he went out the door leaving the two boys to stare at each other, waiting for the other to talk.

"What might that be, Draco?" Harry asked.

"I can't tell you," Draco replied with less of his normal confidence, and Harry drew back his arm.

"Well, why not? You said you wanted to talk1"

"I did, I mean, I do, it's just, I'm not ready."

"When will you be?"

"I don't know. I just don't know…"

Harry sighed and noticed how thirsty he was, "You got a drink somewhere?"

"Yea," and with a flick of his wrist a drink appeared, but with that flick, Harry saw one of the two things Draco didn't want him to see. Instinctively, Harry grabbed Draco's wrist quickly making the drink fall to the floor with the shattering of the glass. "Nice job, Potter."

"What in the hell are these scars? And why are we back on the last name business?"

"The cuts are injuries, and I can call you whatever I fucking want to!"

"So I save your life and all I get is for you to scream at me?! God, Draco. I knew you were a bitch, but I didn't know you were also an ungrateful ass." And Harry stormed off through the door with the angriest expression he could muster although in the inside he was hurting beyond belief. As soon as the dragon couldn't hear the boy's footsteps he found a knife in the pocket of one of his discarded clothes and slowly dragged the edge across his skin.

"Fuck, Potter. He's just a pretty face. He doesn't know what it's like to be me," he said aloud, clueless of just how close Harry's and his lifestyles were…

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Hope you liked it! And it twas longer, no? Should it still be longer? And again I swear I won't post the next chapter unless you review!


	6. Incidents

Thanks for the review . But make me even happier and review again! : ) unless you really do hate my story sob but I'll keep posting because I have no life. Oh yes here is my disclaimer that I forgot last chapter cowers PLEASE DONE SUE ME! I'm too stupid to make a good story thing so J.K. Rowling did 98% of the work but I did a whole 2%! **Note:** I reposted this chapter since I screwed up with the ending and I edited some parts so READ IT AGAIN! HAhaha, and on with the story…

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Recap:

Harry sighed and noticed how thirsty he was, "You got a drink somewhere?"

"Yea," and with a flick of his wrist a drink appeared, but with that flick, Harry saw one of the two things Draco didn't want him to see. Instinctively, Harry grabbed Draco's wrist quickly making the drink fall to the floor with the shattering of the glass. "Nice job, Potter."

"What in the hell are these scars? And why are we back on the last name business?"

"The cuts are injuries, and I can call you whatever I fucking want to!"

"So I save your life and all I get is for you to scream at me?! God, Draco. I knew you were a bitch, but I didn't know you were also an ungrateful ass." And Harry stormed off through the door with the angriest expression he could muster although in the inside he was hurting beyond belief. As soon as the dragon couldn't hear the boy's footsteps he found a knife in the pocket of one of his discarded clothes and slowly dragged the edge across his skin.

"Fuck, Potter. He's just a pretty face. He doesn't know what it's like to be me," he said aloud, clueless of just how close Harry's and his lifestyles were…

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"Fuck that fucking fucker," (A/N sorry I just had to make him say that), Harry muttered as he briskly walked to his dorm. He kept trying to push away this pull to Draco and couldn't help feeling sad for his self-harm. "Why should I feel bad?" he asked himself as he entered his pleasantly empty dorm room, "He did it to himself." The-boy-who-lived needed to be alone, then he noticed his knife lying on the table. Sirius gave it to him before he died. A single tear rolled down Harry's cheek as he remembered his loving godfather and he picked up the knife. "Draco does it…" and with that he placed the knife against his skin. _Why do I have to be so curious?_ When he pushed the knife into his skin and dragged it along, he felt such bliss that was never known to him. He forgot about Sirius, Draco, Hogwarts, his parents and Voldemort. All that existed was he, his knife, and his blood. Little did he know that Hermione and Ron were watching in horror as he mutilated his body.

"What are you doing Harry?" Ron asked bewildered.

Harry snapped out of his daze and looked at his rapidly bleeding arm, "I-I-Draco…"

"What did Draco do this time? Madame Pomfrey was right about you being suicidal. Let's go there now," Hermione said in her normal tone.

"No! Hermione, please don't. Draco cuts and I was just curious. I'm not that way I sear. And the cuts will heal. If you take me to Pomfrey, Dumbledore's going to freak!"

Hermione let out a deep breath, "I guess you're right. Just please promise me that you won't do it again."

"I won't" he replied, not promising anything.

Ron who had been silent piped up, "I think me and Herm will go to the library for awhile." Ron knew his best friend, he liked to be alone in times like these.

"But Ron, Harry…" she stopped mid-sentence as Ron slipped a hand over her butt, "needs to be alone. Bye Harry, I hope you get better!"

Harry waved them off and let the wave of exhaustion flow over him. He didn't even know why he was so tired, but he got himself ready for bed. But not without one final slash on his arm. _Cutting isn't so bad. Maybe we aren't so different after all. Why did I ever put my hand on his waist? It felt so good...but there's no way he feels the way I do._

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Draco awoke in Pansy's room and he felt a wave of fear rush over him until he realized he was alone. His wrists were, once again, aching awfully and so was the rest of his body causing him to groan in pain as he sat up. _I cut because of Potter last night_, he realized, _Malfoy, you're falling faster for him. Get a grip! _After battling himself in his mind, he finally decided it would be best if he left to his own dormitory. Draco put on his clothes and headed out the door.

The hallways were eerily quiet and for a fleeting moment he thought Voldemort had started his war but then a wave of shock went over him. It was 11 o'clock and on a Monday! Draco ran to his room and grabbed his things and ran off to DADA class, but once he got there, he wished he had stayed in Pansy's room. The whole class was staring at him as he walked up to a man standing behind a door. The Gryffindor side sniggered and the Slytherins gave their best looks of sympathy, which were not very convincing.

"Um, excuse me, Mr. Strongford?" Draco asked as quietly as he could and stifled a gasp when his abusive father turned to look at him.

"I wondered where you were you foolish brat," he spat and slammed Draco against one of the walls in front of the class, "Out with the girls again, where you, you little whore?" He pushed the hook of his cane into Draco's neck, "No matter how many times I try you're always an embarrassment to the Malfoy line!" his voice raised till the very end of his taunting and ended with his hand colliding with Draco's cheek. Pansy laughed, Hermione gasped, Ron turned red, everyone laughed, but Harry stared at the floor, grabbing his wrist. "Go sit down, dumb ass." Lucius said as he pushed his son towards the empty seat by his neck, making everyone laugh even more.

After Crabbe and Goyle moved their things to go sit by Draco, class resumed and then ended with Slytherin up by 300 points, Gryffindor losing 450 points, and Draco making Slytherin lose 100. After class, Draco never even said a word to anyone before rushing out the door to his dormitory, but he couldn't even go there before being interrupted.

"So you're a death eater's bitch, huh?" said the sneering voice of Blaise Zambini.

"Fuck off, Blaise." Draco replied suddenly tired.

"So you don't deny it? What's so wrong about doing it with Pansy if you do it with your dad? Oh, I see. You must be gay."

"I am not gay, and never will be!"

"I know the way you look at Potter." Blaise said in his more-than-normal-know-it-all voice and Draco stared at him in disbelief. "Speechless? Ha, I should have known you liked the boy-who-just-won't-die the whole time, making you a lesbian. And in that case," He pushed himself and Draco on the wall on top of each other, "let's have some fun." _Not again…_ he went to whip out his wand but was too quick for another person already was speaking their curse.

(A/N: I was going to end the chapter there but I decided not to. You can thank me later =) But I'm going back to Harry's POV from Dark Arts Classes so you will have to wait a little while longer ducks sharp objects being thrown by angry reviewers )

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ Harry's POV

"How do you think he's going to react to see his dad as the dark arts professor?" Hermione asked.

"I don't know, but I don't think it'll be good. Where is he anyway? I didn't see him in potions." Harry asked.

"Maybe we got lucky and he died," Ron added.

Hermione gave him a stern look and guessed, "Or maybe he already knows about his father and decided to fake a sickness. I can see him doing that." Harry, however, said nothing more as the classroom filled up with more students till Lucius Malfoy himself stepped out from behind the door and wrote his name in green and silver sparks at the front of the room, making his S's look like snakes.

"I am Lucius Malfoy, your new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor," he drawled the way all male Malfoys do.

"Aren't you a death eater?" Neville asked and Seameus (sp?) clamped a hand over Neville's mouth too late.

Malfoy's face grew red for a moment then resumed his natural color. "50 points will be taken away from Gryffindor for unnecessary questions." Neville slumped into his chair and the Slytherins whooped. "NOW," he yelled, "let's begin our classes, shall we?" The next 20 minutes followed with Slytherin being awarded points when someone coughed, and Gryffindor being docked 50 points when someone yawned. Harry began to get worried. _You're worrying about Malfoy you stupid git! Stop stop stop! _But he couldn't stop until he finally saw Draco walk in.

"Look what the dog dragged in," murmured Ron as Draco went up to the front of the class. Harry took a good look as Draco. _He walks so elegantly; I could just run my fingers through his hair, and god, his full lips and big eyes…Ahh…_Harry realized he was fantasizing about his worst enemy and a guy at that! He soon began to scold himself. _Worry? Maybe, but fantasize? No way in hell. _He began drawing a black and white dragon on a piece of parchment, but his head soon snapped up from a loud banging sound.

Harry watched as the poor defenseless son was pounded around and verbally abused by his own father, but when Lucius struck him against his face, he felt waves of anger, pity, sadness, happiness, and love wash through him at the same time. It was then that he also felt the horrible panging of the urge to inflict self-injury on his wrist and the prickling sensation in his scar. Instinctively, he grabbed his wrist and tried to squeeze the want of pain out of his body. To his horror he saw his vision blur and an all-too-familiar wetness on his eyes. He quickly looked down so no one would see. "What's happening to me," Harry shakily whispered to himself.

To his relief, the torturing ceased and Draco was forced to a seat quickly followed by his goons. The class began and ended much like a class of Potions with Professor Snape might have gone. But unlike how Snape wanted Harry out of his sight as soon as possible, Malfoy asked him to see him after class. Stripped of all self-confidence, Harry slowly trudged the lonely path up to their new Dark Arts teacher.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Potter," he drawled and pulled the award-winning Malfoy grin, "How has your relationships been going with your classmates?" Harry was momentarily in shock. This was not what he expected Malfoy, of all people, to talk to him about. "You know, Ron, Hermione, Draco," The way he said Draco made him shiver inwardly "Ah, yes, how have you and Draco been getting along?"

Harry swallowed, unsure of a safe response, "Same as always," he said, trying to sound casual but his voice squeaked.

"So he hasn't been nicer to you, trying to become friends?"

"No professor."

Malfoy looked a little peeved, "All right, I'm going to give you something. If you're too dumb to read, it's an invitation to one of our wonderful dinner parties. I expect you to come if you even want to think about passing this year. All the information is there. Now, go."

"Thank you, professor." Then he briskly walked out of the room. _Was I just invited to Lucius Malfoy's party? _He thought but stopped dead in his tracks to the scene of Blaise Zambini about to rape Malfoy, but to Harry; it just looked like Draco was going to be beat up. "No," he whispered, "STUPEFY!" (A/N: is that the right curse?) With that, Blaise fell to the floor, stiff as a board, while Draco stood there with his mouth agape.

"Did you just save me, Harry?" _Why did he say my name again?_

"What's going on over here?" Professor McGonagal (sp?) snapped. She gasped, "Harry, Draco, explain yourselves!"

"He was going to beat him up!" Harry said at the exact same time that Draco said, "He tried to rape me!" and they looked at each other, wondering who was right. By then, a crowd of students had gathered around the scene.

"This calls for Professor Dumbledore. Come. We're going to his office. Crabbe, Goyle, please escort Mr. Zambini here to Madame Pomfrey." She ordered as she conjured a stretcher and hurried two very confused Harry and Draco to Headmaster Albus Dumbledore.

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Sorry for the extremely long wait! I went on a 9-day family vacation and you can't easily bring your computer on the plane. Now that its summer I can update faster and I promise I'll never make you wait that long again. But you see that little Go button next to the words, _Submit Review_? That holds the key to life…well to the life of this story at least. I won't go on without another review and thanks a lot for all the kind reviews. I'll try not to let you down!


	7. Rumors and a Dinner Party

Sorry it took me awhile to update. I suffered a minor case of writer's block but I'm better now and I decided how the story will go. Thanks to all my reviewers! I luff ya to pieces.

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Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the silver lining around the cloud. . J. K. Rowling owns the cloud.

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Recap:

Malfoy looked a little peeved, "All right, I'm going to give you something. If you're too dumb to read, it's an invitation to one of our wonderful dinner parties. I expect you to come if you even want to think about passing this year. All the information is there. Now, go."

"Thank you, professor." Then he briskly walked out of the room. _Was I just invited to Lucius Malfoy's party? _He thought but stopped dead in his tracks to the scene of Blaise Zambini about to rape Malfoy, but to Harry; it just looked like Draco was going to be beat up. "No," he whispered, "STUPEFY!" With that, Blaise fell to the floor, stiff as a board, while Draco stood there with his mouth agape.

"Did you just save me, Harry?" _Why did he say my name again?_

"What's going on over here?" Professor McGonagal snapped. She gasped, "Harry, Draco, explain yourselves!"

"He was going to beat him up!" Harry said at the exact same time that Draco said, "He tried to rape me!" and they looked at each other, wondering who was right. By then, a crowd of students had gathered around the scene.

"This calls for Professor Dumbledore. Come. We're going to his office. Crabbe, Goyle, please escort Mr. Zambini here to Madame Pomfrey." She ordered as she conjured a stretcher and hurried two very confused Harry and Draco to Headmaster Albus Dumbledore.

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Draco and Harry silently walked behind McGonagal, but they were glancing at each other repetitively. Before they knew it, they were at Dumbledore's office. "Tootsie Roll" was the password and they stepped into the spiral staircase and made their way into the office.

"Good evening, Harry, Draco," Dubledore greeted placidly, "Lemon drop."

"Excuse me headmaster, but I'd like to get these students to class on time."

"Yes, yes miss. Now, will you two explain yourselves?"

"W-well Blaise was tr-trying to uh hurt me, Po-Harry saved me." Draco stuttered. _I've never heard him stutter before. It's kind of cute….no! NO! Not cute!_

"Is that what happened, Mr. Potter?" Dumbledore asked.

"Yes, sir," he replied, trying to avoid too much talking.

"Alright then, I'll talk to Mr. Zambini in the Hospital Wing. Yo're free to go," and with that, Hogwart's headmaster apparated.

"Go to class, NOW!" McGonagal ordered and the two boys shuffled off. The next class was Potions which they also shared. They walked along opposite walls until Draco broke the silence.

"Erm thanks for saving me from Blaise. Nasty little bugger ain't he?"

"It's no problem. And one more thing, never call me Harry in public again!"

"Oh ok…" He seemed a little taken aback. As they walked into their class, what seemed like a thousand heads swiveled around to look at them. Rumors were flying after that day's incident. They had a relationship and Blaise got jealous. Harry wanted a piece of Draco, instead of Blaise. None of them were right. The two took their seats and Snape entered. Instantly, the chatter died out around them.

"I trust our class will not be interrupted from this day's incident. Oh, and before I forget: 15 points from Gryffindor for unnecessary hexing. The Slytherin's all laughed except for Draco and Zambini, who returned from the hospital wing. He just glared in Harry's direction. The rest of the class with continued as usual. Except that Snape didn't take away any points, although he didn't give any either.

That night at at the Gryffindor House table, it was more than awkward. (they do have dinner there right lol) "How is everyone doing today?" Harry asked light-heartedly.

"Um, fine mate." Ron replied.

"Just studying," Hermione said, trying to sound just as care-free.

"Look, you guys seriously don't think I have feelings for Malfoy, do you?"

"Well you did save him…" Hermione said uncertainly.

"That was just my "hero" showing out. You know I can't resist that feeling. And I suffered for that…" there was a saddened pause at the table, "but I think having "fun" with a bouncing ferret would be complicated." They all laughed.

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Draco envied Harry._ How can he laugh like that? I never could._ The Slytherin's were ignoring him. Yes they were ignoring Draco, the Slytherin prince, for being saved by him. He hated Harry, but he loved him. Draco started aimlessly scratching at his arm. He wished he wouldn't be so submissive to his emotions, but he couldn't help it. Then he stood up from the table, and started to walk to his private dorm room.

As he was passing the Dark Arts classroom, a drawling voice called out to him, "Draco, dear, may I see you for a second?"

Draco stopped in his tracks. Whenever his father used that sickly sweet voice to him he knew he was in for a beating. He knew he'd get an even worse time if he didn't return the call, so reluctantly, he walked into his father's room. "Yes, professor?"

"I invited Harry Potter to one of our dinner parties. I trust you will be able to get the job I have asked you to do finished."

"Yes sir."

"You agitating twit! You always let me down. But then again, what can I expect from a half-breed son?" He was referring to his muggle mother. Lucius got a little drunk and got with a muggle woman. After that night, they didn't see each other. But soon enough, the lady found him. Draco was four by then. He remembered the conversation all too well…

¤¤¤¤ Flashback ¤¤¤¤

"Lucius, you must take him in. He's your responsibility." It was Narcissa, his fake mother, who he loved more than anything before.

"It is the responsible thing to do." That was the care-taker. His real mother was a drunk bum and child services "rescued" him.

"Get the bloody boy off my hands! I don't give a fuck if you have to kill him just get him away!" That was his real mother. Draco didn't know if he would have rather stayed with her than Lucius. She threw an empty beer bottle across the room that was full five minutes ago.

"Please, do it Lucius. He needs a good home. Let him stay with us." Narcissa pleaded. Draco loved her at once.

"Fine! As long as you do the baby stuff." Lucius snapped. He formally led the care-taker and Draco's mother out of the house. Slap "Never, Ever plead in public again, woman!" Lucius scream and kicked her in the stomach. She doubled over in pain. "As for you, find a bedroom and stay there. The house-elves will alert you for dinner." He was so frightened he ran off without a word. "That's the kind of people I like. As for you…" Draco shut the door and blocked out the screams and cries.

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He felt a cold hand colide with the back of his head. "Are you listening to me?" Lucius screamed, then he visibly relaxed, leaning back on his chair. "Screaming won't do any good. I have to keep my voice up to teach everyone. Let's talk this out in your room." Draco's eyes enlarged. He knew what this meant. Pain. His father roughly picked him up by his cloak collar, choking him, and carried him off to his room. He was then thrown upon his bed.

"I'm sure this should teach you a lesson," Lucius said, trying to sound fatherly. But draco knew what was coming was nothing close to fatherly. He put a locking spell on the door and pulled out a whip and his knives; he had eight. "I'll be needing all of these. Undress." He ordered. Draco did as he was told, and Lucius did the same. "Get down," with that Lucius spread Draco's legs apart and brought out a knife. He placed it inside Draco's hole and twirled it around. Draco chocked on his own screams. Then Lucius brought it up to his length and dragged it the whole way up, but when he got to the foreskin Draco screamed. Quick as lightning, Lucius grabbed another knife and slammed it into Draco's stomach making him scream again. Lucius only got another knife and did the same. Draco getting the idea, stifled another scream and blocked otut tears.

"I thought you would get it eventualy. Then Lucius put an enlarging spell on his manhood and rammed all the way into Draco. He heard the sick sound of skin ripping. Unfortunately, Draco screamed and got another knife in the stomach. Lucius slammed into Draco over and over again until he came and pulled out. "Turn over," he ordered. Draco was too sore to move. Lucius got yet another knife and used it to turn Draco over, making it stick into his back. His eyes bulged out of their sockets from pure pain. "You'll pay for making me do that." He put on safety-gloves and used pain potion to lubricate the inside of Draco's end. Every muscle inside him squeezed at the sheer pain of it all. Mr. Malfoy then again went inside Draco and Draco couldn't stop screaming so he took a knife and cut slashes across Malfoy's neck, each time he screamed he cut deeper. Finally, he came and pulled out.

"This part is a fair deal. I'll whip you for everytime you have defiled me in your life." Draco didn't dare mention he whipped him when it happened too. In the end, Draco had over 200 lashes on his back. 150 for things he didn't remember doing. "Hm I guess I didn't need these knives. All well," he said and slit Draco's wrist, adding to his personal collection of scars. "I expect you to be at the party tomorrow night," Lucius added before leaving, menacingly. That left draco, blissfully, alone.

__

He's never gone that far before. I need to get out of here. He tried to move but his muscles were so sore he passed out from the pain.

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Harry rolled out of bead, screaming in agony. Many lights flickered on.

"Harry, mate! Is it your scar?" Ron asked worriedly.

"No…its…everything…" Harry gasped and Ron ran off to get Dumbledore. Harry's roommates were too frightened to do anything but stare as the golden boy writhed in pain.

"Ronald this had better be import- HOLY LEMON DROPS! Boys, bring Madame Pomfrey to my office. We have some discussing to do." Dumbledore ordered, the twinkle in his eyes gone. He picked up Harry and shuffled Ron to his office.

Once they got there, Dumbledore injected something into Harry making the pain numb away, but he could feel his limbs at the same time. "Tha- Thankyou professor," he gasped and slowly pulled himself up onto a chair.

"Just as I suspected," Dumbledore mumbled, "Harry, have you felt, strangely attracted to anyone?"

Thoughts of Draco flashed through his mind, "No professor."

"I have the strange inkling you're lieing to me, but we will let that pass. It's possible that you long for and love someone so greatly that you actually feel each other's pain." There was an uncomfortable silence between them. "Well then, I guess you to better get some more sleep. Off you go." Gratefully, they left.

"Hey mate, who are you having feelings about?" Ron asked.

"Err no one, Ron,"

"Oh come on! Cho? Someone!"

"I actually don't know who it is." Harry couldn't just let himself like Malfoy, could he?

The two got into bed and shut off the light. To their relief, their roomates fell asleep so they wouldn't be pestered with questions. Harry still felt the uncontrolable pain of Draco. He made a slash on his arm and it began to make a steady stream of blood. That was controlable pain. He liked it. It seemed to be the only thing he could control.

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In the evening, Draco felt back to normal except for the feeling of a slash on his arm. _Did one of my cuts re-open? _He asked himself but when he looked at his arm, his skin was closed and not bleeding. _Odd, _He came to the conclusion that his dad cast an anti-pain spell on him. _Bloody git only did that so I'd be presentable for the party. _As the dragon began to get dressed, his dad barged in.

"Just so you know, Harry Potter has been invited to the dinner party tonight. I trust you'll not fail me once again."

"I won't father."

"Good boy. Now, get dressed before I hurt you again." Lucius said as he slammed the door behind him. _Bloody hell! Harry's coming! What will I wear? _After an hour of freaking out and spazzing, he finally decided on long baggy black pants and a silver velvet long sleeve shirt with a dragon etched on the wrist of the sleeve. The doorbell rang. The party had begun. It was Draco's job to answer the door and greet the guests so he briskly walked to the door to welcome the visitors. _Showing up early?_

The Parkinsons, Goyles, Crabbes, Zambinis, and countless other's streamed into the door, but no sign of Harry. Five minutes after the party had officially started the doorbell rang. Draco happily excused himself and practically skipped to the door. Right before he answered it, he felt a hand squeeze his neck. "Don't let him out of your sight." His father warned and drifted off. The doorbell rang again and Draco answered the door.

Harry looked gorgeous. He wore black pants made of jean material, but what really caught his eyes was the black satin top not buttoned to the top. Draco regained his composure and drawled, "Potter, not glad you could make it."

"I only came because I had too," _God I love his voice…_ Draco was so captivated he nearly fell over when Harry pushed him out of the way. With a huff he pulled himself to a chair across the room from Harry. Harry grabbed a Butter Beer from a passing House-Elf and began to drink it. Draco did the same. Harry declined another drink and just sat there…and sat there…and sat there. While Draco drank…and drank…and drank. Harry was almost asleep and Draco was almost drunk. Drunk enough to blab stuff out but sober enough to mean it.

Draco hobbled over to Harry and sat down beside him.

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"Ellooo there Harry," Harry nearly choked from Draco's bad breath. "Have another two drinks," Draco offered and shoved two glasses at Harry, almost spilling them. Harry drank them down and himself became quite drunk. The two began having an actually fun time and talked and laugh. Half drunk talk, half real. This was the happiest Harry had been.

"You know hiccup Harry, you've been looking good lately." Said the sober side of Draco.

"I know," a drunk Harry replied. Before he knew what had happened, Draco planted a firm, yet sweet kiss on Harry's lips. Entranced at the skill he had, even while drunk, he forgot what was happening. Until he suddenly snapped back to reality and shoved Draco away, "What the hell were you doing?!"

"Kissing you,"

"I know bloody well you were kissing me why the hell did you do it?"

"Because I love you, Harry." Time froze. Harry dropped the shot glass he was holding in surprise making everyone turn their way.

"What?" Harry croaked.

"I love you, Harry. I always have. Please say you feel the same way."

Harry shook his head in disbelief. He wanted someone to say that to him so badly and mean it in more than a friend's way for so long, but Malfoy? He couldn't handle that. _He was just drunk. That's the problem. _He tried to reassure himself, but something in him knew he was wrong. Slowly, he started to back away from Draco.

"Harry? Where are you going?" Harry turned around and quickened to a jog, "Harry, wait! Don't leave!" Harry ran the last few steps out the door and out into the night. A broken Draco started sobbing before he knew what hit him and ran to his room. Part shame, part drunk, part sad, and part longing.

Meanwhile, Harry ran down the road. _Why did I ever go there? I need to go and find someone. I need to tel someone what happened. But who can I tell?_ Thoughts attacked his mind as he raced off into the night…

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Oh gosh, I'm the worst author ever. I probably left you waiting like 6 weeks! I'm sure whatever readers I had are gone now…anyway. Readers, new and old, please review and tell me what you think. Suggestions welcome too!


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